Destination to the Left

gpsLast night as we were laying in bed…..waiting for sleep to overtake us and carry us to that dreamland that is always so coveted at the end of the day a woman’s voice spoke to us.   In the stillness of the night a familiar voice was heard to say “Your destination is on your left.”   Oh yes—the ever present GPS lady who always seems to be just late enough in her directions to allow that fork in the road to be missed, that right turn impossible when you are in the far left lane, and that landmark that you were being directed toward now appears in your rear view mirror.

Obviously Chris had somehow forgotten to silence the wench from inside his phone after we got back to the apartment but why she decided to speak up at that particular moment and not before is a mystery.

But the neat thing—guess what was at his destination on the left?   ME!   Maybe she knew what she was talking about all the time.



  1. I can relate. We call Bill’s truck satellite GPS, “Hal” (from “2001: A Space Odyssey”), because he sounds like that! So we call our phone GPS lady, “Halle”. She is bad enough, but Hal is ridiculous. He will suddenly tell Bill to make a U-turn or to, ” Turn NOW!”…into a corn field! Once he showed us IN a cornfield, and we were going down a road! I am glad that your hubby’s GPS Halle directed him to you!

    • Oh I love Hal and Halle!! Perfect names! And I am sure that Bill can turn that truck on a dime to accommodate the immediate u turn, right? We have ended up in the water many times–or at least it looks like we are in the water and we aren’t. Chris talks back to ours a LOT!

      • Bill has learned to use Hall (and Halle) as guides, but not as absolutes. You can’t take an 18- wheeler down certain roads, or under overpasses and bridges the way you can a 4-wheeler! He uses his instinct and wits to say out of trouble. He also “talks” to Hal & Halle…a lot.

        • I am sure he has better judgment than Hal has! It does make me laugh when ours seems to get “irritated” when Chris continually ignores her and goes his own way. Sometimes it seems like she just gives up and stays quiet after repeated attempts to redirect fall on deaf ears. 🙂

  2. Joanna graham says:

    OMG. How fantastic. She is a genius and I’m sure Chris liked it too. I’m glad for verbal directions these days instead of always looking at a map bug I know what you mean about the review mirror thing. That’s happened to me more than once

    • I think a lot of folks can identify with the errant directions. It is a good thing most times, though—if only they could be a little quicker on the draw in the instructions as times.

  3. As a GPS-less person, I have not dealt with any of this. But I can see the GPS wench certainly spices up life. She seemed, at least on this evening, one smart lady.

  4. My husbands is this throaty voiced gal with an English accent. I keep waiting for her to hit on him. “Turn left at the next lights.” “proceed 300 km” “what are you wearing?” LOL

    • Haha!!! My friend reminded me that it was a good thing it was not MY GPS which I have set to a Billy Bob Thornton “Karl” from Slingblade voice…….it makes driving oh so much more enjoyable to hear him saying “some people might want to turn right here…..uh huh.”

  5. I’m glad you were the destination on his left! Those GPS ladies can be really annoying sometimes.

  6. That’s kind of a sweet story! And I don’t like that snooty voice one bit. 🙂

  7. I was coming back from Cape Cod after the 4th of July and my GPS kept trying to send me in the wrong direction, I kept telling it that I didn’t want to take that exit, but it didn’t listen.. “In a quarter of a mile take the next right and then make a legal U-turn on to route 95 south… “No” I said,”I want to go north”.. ” In a quarter of a mile your exit is on your right, then make a legal u-turn on to route 95 South.” To which I replied.. “@#%& you I’m heading north period!!” Then came this response: “Yeah? Well @#%& you too! Go wherever the he!! you want to, but don’t ask me to bail you a$$ out when you end up in some french-speaking, podunk town in Canada, I quit!

    I haven’t dared turn it on since.

  8. Thanks for the chuckle, this post made me smile. Sounds like your GPS lady knows what she’s talking about 😉

  9. I think I am missing a lot of entertainment as I have no GPS.

  10. That is too funny! We all have funny GPS stories but yours has to be the best.

  11. GPS wench! LOL You never lack entertainment, do you?

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