My Finger Feels Naked

Chris and I are coming up on the big 30.  Hard to believe that come July 18th we will have been married 30 years.  How did we get here???   Well, don’t answer that one—I know how we got here!!!  It has been an amazing journey that I can not imagine sharing with anyone else.

We have always celebrated our anniversary by trying to do something special.  In the past years we have been fortunate enough to be able to take some pretty wonderful trips.  In the early years we usually did a nice dinner out.  This year Chris really wanted to do something that would be a symbol of our love and so he suggested that this would be the year that we got our wedding bands redone.

After 3o years of wear, 31 for my engagement ring, they are a little worn. The once brushed gold is now smooth.  The rings are comfortable.  Kind of like marriage becomes after awhile, at least for us.  We have slipped into a comfortable place where we can not imagine life without the other.  It is a part of who we are.

So when we went to the jeweler to talk about what we wanted to do and when I took off my bands I felt naked.  Those rings have been a part of me for so long and to suddenly have them taken off made me a little sad. We debated what to do—do we just have our old rings turned in for the gold?  I think we hit upon the perfect solution—-all of our rings are going to be a part of our new rings.  My two will surround a new silver ring and Chris’s ring will be surrounded by two silver rings.  We will be opposites but yet the same in a way.  And we will still have the “old” with us as well as the new.  I am very excited that we will be able to have what we hope will be the perfect rings for us.

In the meantime, though, my finger continues to feel very strange.  I miss having a ring on my left hand.  It just feels wrong.


  1. I love that you are redoing your rings… I know what you mean about your fingers feeling naked although I am married only for 6 1/2 years… When I went to the DR for work last year I didnt want to wear my engagement ring and wedding band. Instead I wore a simple gold band that I got married in… Although I had a ring on, I felt so naked….

  2. Congratulations on this shining accomplishment of 30 years, and Happy Anniversary.

  3. 30 years…wow! I mean, really wow! We are coming up on 10 years and I’m looking forward to saying 30. I love your idea for the rings. And hang on!

  4. Wow. 30 years… Happy Anniversary to both of you!!! I don’t think, I have taken off my wedding band (we have matching ones) other than for surgery in the 11 years we have been married. I don’t like the feeling of not having it on… so I know how you feel. Can imagine the feeling is even more odd after 30 years.

  5. Thirty years has a nice ‘ring’ to it..Congratulations. And wishes for 30 more. (at least)

  6. Allow me to wish you an early congratulations and happy anniversary. What an accomplishment. It’s truly beautiful to feel the love that this post exudes. Your rings sound lovely, my friend.

  7. Oh, happy congratulations, Beth (and Chris)! What a lovely sentiment – I remember how naked my finger felt after my split. I kept feeling for something that was gone in so many ways. It’s nice to have a ring back on it again, with the promise of permanence.

    • Thanks so much!!! Glad that you have a ring back on and that you are feeling that promise again….it is a good thing to love and be loved!!! 🙂

  8. Congratulations, Beth Ann!!

  9. 30 years!!! how absolutely wonderful. It’s the “Chrisisms” isn’t it? that’s the secret – LOL

    Fabulous idea for the rings. Mine are only coming up to 10 years, so I guess to early to hint for new ones. Although, I am always forgetting to put mine back on after gardening, and Left Brain never wears his while at work. we make it work still 🙂

    • You are right!!! It is the Chrisisms!!!!! LOL Chris wanted to get me an anniversary ring for our 10 year—but alas—we were in no financial place then to be getting anything like that. He surprised me 2 years later with a beautiful anniversary ring and it was worth the wait! I am not a huge jewelry person but my rings from him are my most treasured pieces!!!

  10. Helen Brown says:

    I have been wearing my rings on my right hand for several years but the left hand still feels strange without them. I also hope you have another 30 years to celebrate. I only had almost 43 with my wonderful husband.

  11. Becky Miracle says:

    Can’t wait to see pictures of the new ones. Sounds like so much fun and a great way to mark the occasion.

  12. Great idea to do over your rings! But I know how you feel without your rings – I felt the same way when I divorced my first husband. I moved my rings to my right hand because they were unusual & didn’t look like your typical wedding set, so they looked nice as a dressy ring on my other hand. But for days, my thumb kept creeping over to the 4th finger of my left hand to turn my wedding rings & they weren’t there.

    • It is nice you could still wear your rings on your other hand. That is what I always wondered if divorced folks wanted to do that or just get rid of them altogether. I guess it depends on situation but how nice that you still have a nice piece of jewelry that you can keep!

  13. Congratulations on your soon to be 30th wedding anniversary! We just celebrated ours in May, and I, too, wonder where the years went.

    The re-do of your rings sounds beautiful. Be sure to show us when you get the rings back.

  14. pattisj says:

    I would go nuts, thinking I’d lost my rings! The thumb is always checking to make sure they’re there, especially the little pinkie I wear on my right hand that was my mom’s wedding band. Congrats on 30!

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